Holy Rome? Who's That?
by JCScannell
Summary: We finally find out what happened to the Holy Roman Empire, when he loses his memory after his battle with France. Rated T for an overload of feels. NOTICE: The first two chapters are back story! If you want to get on with it, skip to chapter three! There is an alternate ending! Go check out my other story; "Holy Rome Wakes Up".
1. Chaos at my Place

**Hello! So this is my first fanfic. In this story, I put my idea of how HRE becomes Germany.**

**I do not own Hetalia! If I did, Chibitalia and Italy would be different people. Making chibitalia a girl, and ending up with HRE!**

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_1. Chaos At My Place_

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My name is Holy Roman Empire. But you can just call me Holy Rome. A little while ago, a musician called Austria, came to live in my house. He soon married a young woman named Miss Hungary.

Not long after, a young girl named Italy came to live in my house.

At first, I was annoyed. I didn't want _another_ girl in the house. She was clumsy, greedy, and quite a bit of a ditz. Her hair was in an almost boyish cut, with a silly curl off one side of her head. But my ill-feelings didn't last long.

I had to admit, it was endearing the way she tripped, or needed help. It wasn't long until I was in love. But I couldn't tell her that. She seemed oblivious to my feelings. Maybe they weren't mutual? I don't know, I always had trouble understanding girls.

Over time, I found myself getting closer to Italy. I felt that we might be able to become good friends someday. Or maybe. . . Something more? Maybe it was dangerous to think such things.

One day, I decided to let some of feelings known to Italy. However, it didn't go as I had planned.

I had asked her to come to the courtyard with me. "Italy," I started. "I want to be with you forever. Please. . . I want you to join with me! Let us become one great nation!"

"No!" She yelled clear and strong. "No, I can't!"

"What?" I stammered. "Why not?"

"Because!" She answered. "I don't want you to turn out like my Grandpa Rome! He became so big and Powerful! But he became too big, and fell because of it! He had scars all over his body! I don't want that to happen to you!" She broke off.

Of course. Why hadn't I thought of that? She lost her Grandfather not long ago. I know it was hard for her. I probably just brought up bad memories. I can't believe I was so thoughtless, she must hate me now! But, the way she said it… It sounded like she was protecting me? Like… She cared for me?

"I understand." I told her quietly. "I'm sorry." I turned away from her, and ran to my room.

"Wait!" She called out. "Holy Rome!" But I couldn't take it right now. I made it into my room, and thought.

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**AN:**

** Hello! Okay, so here's the thing. I wrote this, as in the ENTIRE STORY, between 10pm and 4am, and the internet was down. That would account for any mistakes I may have made in the time line. Also! I do not ship yaoi! Just for the record.**

** That's it! This will be my first fanfic, so please give your opinions! Thank you!**


	2. A Tearful Goodbye

_2. A Tearful Goodbye_

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I ended up taking a trip. I just needed to get away from the house for a while. It wasn't long, just a small adventure around parts of Europe. It was good for clearing my head. I even got to spend some time with my brother, Prussia.

When I came back, I wanted to talk to Italy. I looked for her, but she was nowhere to be found. I went and found Austria. When I asked him where she was, he told me that she went to visit her country.

I was worried about her, so I decided to check up on her. I quickly traveled to Italy's country. I had wanted to visit for a while anyway, so it would be a good time for sight seeing. I decided to look in Venice, I had always wated to see the canals.

That's what I told myself anyway.

In reality, I followed Italy here. She was standing over one of the canals, her robes fluttering in the wind. She looked peaceful. That is, until some guy came for her help. The guy actually had the nerve to make her run. I wanted to hit him, but I restrained myself.

Apparently, the idiot had made his boat too big, and it got stuck. Italy had yelled at him, telling him what he had done wrong, and quickly made a new law to fix the problem. I felt so proud of her, being so strong.

Then the guy pulled out some candy, which Italy gave into quickly. He attempted to persuade her into letting him keep his big boat. But she told him that no was no, still being strong.

I was glad to see she was taking care of herself. I decided to take my leave

When I came home, I found that I had some hard decisions to make.

There was a war starting, which involved my country. With the nation on my shoulders, I feared I would have no choice, but to go and help in the fight. The only problem was, there was someone I didn't want to leave. Someone I cared for. . .

Italy came home soon after. She seemed happy to have visited her home. She told me about her visit. After she was done, I had to tell her about my decision to leave.

She was upset. She ran for her room. I felt awful.

Not long after that, I began my preparations to leave. It was almost time.

It didn't take long until everything was ready. The men were waiting on me. When I went outside, Italy was sweeping. Just like she always was. I started heading for the front gate, but Italy caught up to me.

"Holy Rome!" She cried. "Please don't go! I'll miss you!"

"Oh Italy," I replied sullenly. "I'll miss you too. But I have to go."

"I wish you didn't have to."

"As do I." I couldn't stand the look on her face. "But I promise. I promise I'll come back for you!"

She smiled. "And I'll be waiting for you!" She then held up her push broom. "Take this! To remember me." I took it, but I didn't know why. How was a push broom a gift? But then I remembered, that almost every time I saw Italy, she was always sweeping.

"Thank you." I said. "I'll take care of it." I suddenly realized that I didn't have a present for her. So instead, I leaned in and kissed her cheek. "I'll miss you." I said again. "Oh Italy."

"Oh, Holy Rome." She replied. "I'll miss you too." With that, I left.

"I'll come back!" I called over my shoulder.

"You better!" She called back.

"I will!"

And so, I went off to war.


	3. A Boy At War

_3. A Boy At War_

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The war had lasted much longer than I had anticipated. Almost thirty years, in fact. Long enough that I started to grow just a bit taller. There had been many hard ships throughout this ongoing battle, but the hardest was wondering if I'll be able to see Italy again. I still had the push broom that she gave me. It has helped me to remember myself, and my life back home. It helped me to keep going.

Every once in a while, I would find myself actually sweeping with it. It would almost feel as if she was actually there with me.

Something else I did to help me keep my sanity, was to imagine what I would look like when I grew up. I would be tall, and strong, have a strong chin and piercing eyes.

And Italy. . . She'll be beautiful. With long brown hair, soft eyes, and a gentle voice. We'll be happy.

I had decided that I would confess my feelings to Italy, put it all out, as soon as I got home. I only wished that she would return my feelings. That we can grow up, and be together. I longed for the day that this war would end. For the day I can go home, and hug Italy, and pour out my heart.

Unfortunately. . . That day. . . May never come…


	4. The Defeat of a Child

_4. The Defeat Of A Child_

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So here I am. The war was nearing it's end. But as for the victor, it was impossible to say thus far. The numbers on both sides were dropping dramatically. And now, it was just me, against France.

France was quite a bit bigger than me. An unfair advantage.

We faced each other, swords in our hands. We rushed for each other, and it went by in a blur. I felt my blade hit something once or twice, but I was no match.

He nearly had me. He was so much stronger. He hit me once more, and I fell to my knees. He walked towards me.

_This can't be happening! This is unfair! I still need to see Italy again!_

France came up to me, and bent down. His left hand grabbed the back of my hair, while his right hand held his sword. It was pointed straight at my neck. He kicked my sword away. He leaned in close. "So," He said quietly. It was terrifying. "Are there any last words?"

Was there any last words? Did I have any words left in me? I felt the darkness closing in on me. But what was this darkness? Fear? Death?

Then I realized, what it was I wanted to say. Something I'd been wanting to say, so badly during these thirty years. It had been bubbling inside of me, wanting to get out. It found it's way up my throat, and out of my mouth.

"_Italy. . ."_

The sword tip press against my neck. But then it was pulled away. Why?

"What was that you said?" The Frenchman said. He sounded shocked. Why? What was happening all of a sudden?

"_Italy."_ I said again.

"You know Italy?" France asked. I nodded weakly. _What was with this man? How the heck did he know Italy?_ "How?" The man asked. He dropped his sword, grabbing my collar with both hands. "How do you know Italy?"

Why was man so concerned? I didn't understand. But I felt as if I _wanted_ to tell him. No, that's not it. I just needed to say it out loud. I struggled to get the words out. I was getting weaker, the darkness was still closing in. What was this darkness? The words were working their way out.

"_I… Love… Italy…"_ I managed. I heard the man gasp. I felt his hands drop from my shirt. I drooped, sinking down further on my knees.

"I cant…" I heard France say. What was he talking about? He continued talking to himself. "I can't go back saying that I lost to the kid… But I can't just kill Italy's friend… What should I do?..." Did this guy really know Italy? I forced my head up somewhat so that I could see him. He had backed off from me. He was on his knees, one hand on the ground, the other on his face.

"What if…" He continued. "What if he simply 'disappeared'? I could say I couldn't find him, or that I killed him…" He looked over at me. He came in front of me again. _Man this guy smells bad._

"Listen, Holy Roman Empire." He said. "I can't just kill you, but I can't let you go either. So I want you to disappear. Poof! I'll say I killed you. You'll leave. Find Italy if you wish. But 'you' can't live. Do you understand?"

In all honesty, I had no idea what he was talking about. But if there was a chance that I could see Italy again, I'll take it. I nodded. The darkness grew closer still.

"Wonderful." I think this guy was crazy. "Now, I need to work this out…"

I think he kept talking to me, but I couldn't hear him. The darkness… The silence… It was all so close. It almost had a flavor, or a scent. It was almost sweet. I heard a little voice…

France was pacing. Someone entered the clearing where we were. France seemed to panic. He looked at me, said something, and I felt something hit my face hard.

The darkness nearly had me. There was still a pinprick of light. Everything ran through my head at once. I thought of Italy. I thought of my home. _Italy, home, Italy, home… _They were one in the same.

I felt as if I was being lifted, carried in someone's arms. I know now. What this darkness is. What the last bit of light is. _My mind_. I was slowly losing my mind, only a pinprick left. The darkness swallowed me up.


	5. A New Person

**I used music for inspiration for a lot of the story. When I was writing sad memory scenes for the brothers, I listened to sad songs like Brothers(Vic Mignogna) When I had to write lines for Prussia, I would listen to Mein Gott. For fighting scenes, I listened to 21 Guns(Green Day) So basically, music really helps!**

**Anyway.**

**Story finale!**

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_5. A New Person_

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I awoke in a small room. Where was I? I was lying on a cot, a thin blanket pulled over top of me. I picked up my arms, holding them over my head so that I could see. I had bandages on them. Why? I felt sore in many places. Why was I sore?

I started to sit up, but decided that it hurt too much. That's when I noticed that someone was there. Someone was sitting in a chair next to my cot, with their head and arms on the mattress. They were sleeping.

The person was tall, with white hair and a purple uniform. Who was this person? I was able to prop myself up on my elbow. I poked the person's arm. "Hello?" I asked. My voice sound strange, and alien to me. A boy's voice?

The person stirred and sat up. I saw that it was a young man, probably in his early twenties at most. He had a thin face, and red eyes. He looked around for a second, then saw me. His face lit up and he leaned forward, half sitting on my cot, hugging me.

"You're awake!" He cried. He pulled away. "How are you felling?"

"Um…" I thought for a second. "Fine, I guess."

The man smiled again. "That's good." He leaned in and was hugging me again.

"Um, excuse me." I said.

"Yes?" The man asked. "What is it?"

"Where am I?"

"You're in the hospital. Don't you remember?"

"I'm sorry but… Who are you?" I asked.

The man stiffened, and pulled away. "You don't know who I am?" He asked. He sounded appalled, and sad. "You don't remember me?"

"No. Sorry."

"Do you remember who you are?"

"No, I don't."

The man still looked shocked. He cleared his throat. "Well, to start with, you are a country. Your name is Holy Roman Empire."

"What!?" Well, this was surprising. "I'm a country?"

"That's right." The man smiled sadly. "Does that sound familiar?"

"No…" I thought about it. Do I feel like a country? How would that feel in the first place? I searched my heart. I felt something… Deep down… "Well, maybe the country part. But the name? It doesn't sound right."

"Really?" He asked.

"Yes… Hey." I said. "Who are you? What's your name?"

"My name is Prussia. I'm also a country. And…" He paused. His face saddened, just a bit. "I'm also your brother."

"Really?" Another surprise. First I'm a country, now I have a brother. I wonder if I look anything like him? "Are you my _big_ brother? Do I look like you? Will I grow up to be big like you?"

The man smiled again. "Yes, I'm your big brother. And no, we don't look alike. Here." He handed me something shiny. It was a mirror. I held it up. I stared at the young man in the mirror. I didn't know him.

The boy in the mirror looked to be ten at most. He had light blond hair that was somewhat shaggy, and in the eyes. I didn't like that. I ran my hand through the hair, pulling it back out of my face. The eyes were light blue, and wide. The chin was rounded, but the jaw bone was wide.

"As for you growing up big," Prussia said. "I have no doubt." I looked in the mirror longer, trying to learn the face that belonged to me. "Do you remember anything?" Prussia asked.

I thought for a minute. There was a feeling here and there. Lightness, a sweet voice, a crushed heart, darkness. But that didn't mean anything to me. "No." I said. "Can you tell me anything?"

"Well, let's see…" Prussia, my big brother, thought for a minute. "Do you remember living with Austria? And my old friend, Miss Hungary? They're countries too."

I thought about it. I tried to will a memory to come, but nothing happened. "No."

"Hmm… Oh!" He said. "How about the little girl you liked? Italy? Do you remember her?" Again, I tried to remember. But yet again, nothing came.

"No."

"Hmm… Hey! What if you go see her?"

"Who? The girl?"

"Yes!"

"Uh… No. I don't want to go look for someone who I've forgotten." Prussia's face saddened. I remembered that I had also forgotten him. I must have hurt his feelings. Oh well, he can get over it. "Hey, tell me something. Why am I in the hospital anyway?"

Prussia's face hardened. "You were fighting." He started. _Well, this'll be interesting. _"You were in a war for almost thirty years. You eventually met the nation face himself. I tried to come and help you, but I was too late. I had found the clearing where you were fighting. You were on your knees, with that man standing in front of you." He said _that man_ as if it left a bad taste in his mouth. "I ran for you, but I was afraid I wouldn't make it. He saw me. Then he…" He paused for a moment, then continued. "He kicked you in the face. You looked right at me just before he did. A little kid-" His voice broke. He took a deep breath, then continued.

"He ran off. I almost went after him. Oh how I wanted to kill him… But I knew that you were my first priority. I went to you, fearing that you were gone. But, somehow, you were still alive. But your wounds were bad. I carried you here myself. I don't know why he didn't kill you." He looked up at me. "I just know that I'm glad he didn't."

I was having trouble believing this. A war for thirty years, and I still look this young? Just how old am I? And who was this man who almost killed me? I looked at my brother. I could tell, he isn't ready to talk about it. Not just yet.

Before long, my wounds healed and I was let go from the hospital. Prussia brought me an extra outfit for me, since apparently my other one was torn. It was a black suit, with a black cloak, and a black cap. So much black. It was unpleasant. It reminded me of something. But what?

When we got in the carriage, I took off the cloak and the cap. "So where is it we're going again?" I asked.

"We're going to my house, since you said you didn't want to go back to yours. Don't worry, it's awesome. Like me." He looked at the pile of material at my feet. "Did you not like the cape, Holy Rome?" There's that name again…

"It's too much black. It was depressing." This seemed to amuse him.

"What color would you prefer to wear then, Holy Rome? Something awesome like mine? Because my uniform's pretty awesome."

I thought for a second. I looked out the window. The trees and bushes were so beautiful. I would be great to be able to disappear in to them. "Green." I said. "I want to wear green. And also, can you please stop calling me 'Holy Rome'? I don't like it."

"Okay then." Prussia said, still seemingly amused. "What would you like to be called?"

I thought for another minute. I searched in my heart for what name felt right. "I want to be called. . ."

"Yes?"

"I want to be called Germany." I said surely. "Call me Germany from now on."

**_ The End _**

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**AN:**

**All done! You don't hate me, do you? If you didn't like the ending, then there's a happy, alternate ending! Just go look at my other story; "Holy Rome Wakes Up".**

**I know Prussia was a bit different then usual. But I wanted to show a broken, greiving, big brother Prussia. When it was still on MS Word on my computer, I had really cool pictures throughout the story to help with the feels. Unfortunately, FF wouldn't let me do that. :/ Oh well!**

**I had my younger sister read it for me, and she said she both hated it and loved it at the same time!**

** Anyway, I hope you liked it!**

**Please review! Love you all!**


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